Five Tips for a Purposeful Life

A young person of my acquaintance asked me the other day what it's all about, this life thing. Ah, the human condition! It's a topic that I've been giving much thought recently as I have one of those periodic bouts of introspection and contemplate what should be the final third of a 'regulation' working life.

It also reminded me of the 'three truths' that Lewis Howes asks his guests at the end of every interview. The scenario is that it is the last day of your life, everything you have done or said has been erased but you get to reveal three truths, which is all that will remain of you. Sometimes people are profound, sometimes not.

Well that has made me think about what would be my advice on how to live a life of purpose. What would I pass on to my kids? I've used up more than three but here goes:

Be Kinder
Be kinder to the people you love, be kinder to the people you don't like, be kinder to the planet and be kinder to yourself. It doesn't cost anything but it does require a bit of effort. It requires effort to thank people, to not get angry, to think about things from another person's perspective. That kind (or unkind) word that feels very small to you could have far bigger consequences that you will ever know. A butterfly flaps its wings etc. So please make that effort.

Work Hard
Yes, work hard in pursuit of something that you care about. Put your full effort into things and be proud of what you do. There is a finite amount of time that we have on the planet and none of us know just how long it is, only that it is counting down. So spend it wisely.

Put your efforts into something that you love. Don't look back on wasted years, act now. If you can't find work that you love then you need to find a way to love (or even just tolerate) the work that you do and find your passions elsewhere.


Live Your Own Life
We are all broadcasters these days. Via Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat and whatever the next thing is called, we broadcast a version of ourselves to the world (or at least our friends) every day. The truth though is something different. We know the times that we feel shitty, or ugly, or are spending long hours on boring tasks. We know the doubts and insecurities that we live with. That is not what we broadcast though.

We present the outside world with smiles and happy families, meals out, exotic holidays and partying with friends. So does everybody else. Don't envy their lifestyle because that's not their life. Don't compare your real life with their Instagram life. Most religions will tell you not to covet an ass or something - that's pretty sound advice.

Think about how you spend your money
I read somewhere that money is just a transfer of effort and I suppose that is correct. We have a choice about every pound/dollar/euro we spend, except for taxes, so think about where it goes. The people and companies that you support with your money matter. It is so easy to talk about buying local or ethical but gets much harder in practice. Amazon don't pay their fair share of taxes and thus undermine public services but damn they are so convenient! It doesn't mean don't shop there but it does mean be mindful of what you are doing.

Finally on this topic, I have been hugely influenced lately by The Minimalists about the need to simply own less stuff. Think carefully about every purchase and consider if it adds value to your life. If it doesn't, don't buy it. If you've already got it, sell it or give it away - you don't need it.

"Love people, use things, because the opposite never works" is their maxim and that just about sums it up for me.

Make an Impact

This one is hard. How do you measure impact? Ghandi or Martin Luther King levels of impact are beyond our reach but we all influence the world in some way. Crudely put, is the world a better place for having had you on it? What have you done with your time here? We can make a difference to the people that we love, our local communities and the world around us but it gets progressively more difficult the further removed they are.

It's easy to love our kids, to look after them, play games with them, help them with homework and offer unstinting support. It gets a bit harder to volunteer in your community, to look in on an elderly neighbour or support a local business. Surely someone else will do that even if you don't? And what then about the world's poor? Whoa, heavy stuff! When the cost of a cup of coffee would pay for a bed net that would protect someone from Malaria, what are our obligations? It's not easy.

And if I could only pick one it would simply be, be kinder.

DISCLAIMER:
Yes, a pretty big disclaimer. After setting out all of the above (which on re-reading sounds a bit like a path to sainthood) I have to hold my hands up. I don't actually do any of these very well. I could be kinder. I could certainly work harder and I am some way off loving my job at the moment. My money goes to all sorts of companies (including Amazon) that don't necessarily support my values. I complained bitterly when the local farm shop closed a few years back but I used it about twice a year! And as for impact? Who knows.

I'm trying harder to live a purposeful life but it is very flawed.